I know I said I wasn’t going to start blogging until next summer because I am in the throes of taking six graduate courses this summer, but I just wanted to hop on here with the one nugget of truth I’ve gleaned while compiling my book for release.
Be willing to bomb your first book.
People ask me sometimes when I talk about The Boxer if it’s any good, some were asking before I even finished it. Truthfully, I don’t know. This isn’t one of those instances where I need to be told that it’s good so my self-esteem can get the nutrients it needs to grow. I’m not that kind of person. Especially since having kids, I am invincible. Whether I get called a terrible writer or a tweenager tells me I’m cheugy at Target when they see me try on a bucket hat, I will still keep writing and I will buy the damn hat. Just kidding, I didn’t buy the hat, it gave me too many flashbacks.
Either way, I’m not fishing for compliments mostly because I don’t really care if this book is good or not. I know there are some parts that are interesting and written well, and I know there are parts that, when I look back in ten years, I might cringe a little (okay, maybe a lot).
I also know that if I’m not willing to put this book out there, there won’t be a Kat in ten years who has written other books that are better. And that’s the thing that’s kept me from losing my mind about finally letting this book out into the world.
I don’t care if it’s good. I care that it exists.
I care that I honored the part of me who wants to do this.
I care that, by creating one book at a time, I am bound to become a better writer.
If you like creating anything, the worst thing you can do is shut down everything that comes to you because you think it won’t be good enough.
You are good enough.
Your work will never be perfect, but you will learn something every time you let yourself create.
You are allowed your mixed feelings. People are allowed their opinions. Take it all in and make the thing anyway.
Write a book that bombs. Paint the shitty painting. Sing a strange song out of key.
Because I’m also saying…
Write a book and create a world. Paint something that means something to you. Sing your soul.
It’s all the same.
Kat Fink 